one ○ video

[chemistries]

[Kon's outside the library, smoking at a computer he built immediately after arriving, staring up at the sky instead of the camera.] So this has all been surprisingly boring so far. I don't care about living in dorms, but playing violent games for points? That got old before high school. I'm more interested in the fact that we all understand each other. The language barrier? It doesn't exist and it should. We're all from different dimensions, right? Someone should definitely be speaking in clicks and grunts.

[He exhales a stream of smoke and rolls his eyes toward the camera.]

Anyway, I've noticed that a lot of the people here are eating takeout and then regretting it later. Would anybody be interested in cooking lessons? I mean, you'd have to be willing to bet that I'm not going to poison you and take your wallet, but look at what you've been eating. It might be worth the risk.

Comments

sob

[ushishishi]

That's why you're tasting it first.

[chemistries]

Assuming I haven't developed tolerances to any poisons or saturated my body in antidote.

[ushishishi]

'shishishi! I doubt you had the foresight to bring enough antidote here.

Even if you did, it's easy enough to find another to taste it.

[chemistries]

Hey, not everybody knows what to do when they end up in a situation like this. [That's more than most people can say.]

It would, wouldn't it? Though there's a guy who's now threatening to kill me if I don't cook for him every day. I'm considering poisoning him. [Deadpan]

Okay, meet me at the grocery store near the dorms at four and be ready to carry things. [If they're gonna do this, they're going to start immediately because gosh something to do!]

[techissexy]

Clearly. Cue the confusion over phones, as previously discussed. They should be thanking you for doing them a service.

It's only fair. He wouldn't happen to be wearing a tiara, by any chance, would he? [ if it's the crazy prince she met during the dorm party, she wouldn't be surprised. ]

Done and done. You be ready to be blown away by how awesome I am in the kitchen. [ killing boredom yay! ]

haha whoops i meant audio

[outfoxing]

I'm afraid I don't have much to offer right now. Is there anything you're after in particular?

VIDEO.

[8fold]

You think cooking lessons are less boring than playing games?

voice;

[gatto]

But it's real convenient that we can all understand each other, yeah? I dunno about you, but I don't wanna have to go around looking for everyone who knows Japanese!

[Besides, that would make winning harder.]

voice;

[mellowyellow]

Man, are you a language professor, a science professor, or a home ec teacher? Pick one! If you're gonna sound pretentious, stick to one subject at least. You'll make everybody else look bad!

[It is debatable whether Masaomi knows the exact definition of the word "pretentious," but he continues nonetheless.]

But the answer you're looking for is that we've all been dumped into a bad sci-fi tv show. That's why all the aliens look and sound human.

[ video ]

[ousawagi]

I guess it's better to be able to understand each other.. [ There's no point questioning the conveniences supplied. He's sure that everyone will want to exploit them regardless of the mechanics behind them.

On the next topic, though-- ]

.. but, um, on the other hand-- learning to cook would be nice.

[VOICE]

[chemistries]

Yeah that's what I figured. [HANGS UP AGAIN.]

[chemistries]

You shouldn't assume anything about people you don't know.

You don't know much about poison, do you.

[chemistries]

I couldn't say; he's not video chatting with me. I don't think he understands how easily I could poison him.

Yeah, I'll have a bucket of water ready.

voice.

[binaries]

I uh, I d-don't know about lessons, but I would be interested in an exchange, um. Be it monetary or even just a task...

[voice]

[chemistries]

How do you expect to win any joypoints if you don't know who you're dealing with?

kljdaskasl ;*

[chemistries]

Tobacco. [He blows a stream of smoke up toward the sky.] If you have any useful skills I'm not above bartering for favors.

VIDEO.

[chemistries]

Have you played any of the games here?

voice;

[chemistries]

Sure. It's just uncanny is all.

voice;

[chemistries]

I don't make a habit of going out of my way to make stupid people feel better about themselves.

Why would someone go through all the effort of luring us here for the sake of a shitty tv show? It'd take a considerable amount of power to pull something like this off; surely they could make it prime time if they wanted.

[ video ]

[chemistries]

Obviously.

Yeah? What could you give me in return?

voice.

[chemistries]

Are you offering to be my lackey if I feed you?

voice.

[binaries]

I, uh -- I'm...

n-not necessarily! [ sir your terminology is offensive. ]

voice.

[chemistries]

So yes.

voice.

[binaries]

Aaaa WAIT

voice.

[chemistries]

For what? You know there are lots of people interested. If you stall you might lose out to somebody else. Do you want to eat or not?